What Is Borderline Personality Disorder?
Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a highly complex mental health condition that affects how a person regulates emotions, experiences relationships, and views themselves. Those with BPD often have intense emotional reactions, fear abandonment, behave impulsively, and have difficulty maintaining stable interpersonal relationships. While these things are trying for those with the disorder, they can spell serious trouble for spouses, children, and other loved ones.
Below you’ll find further details about BPD, the disorder’s signs and symptoms, and the kinds of havoc someone with an unchecked BPD can wreak on families. Whether you’re in a relationship with someone with BPD, navigating a custody battle with a co-parent who suffers from the disorder, or have any other pressing issue involving a person with BPD, we hope you find this information illuminating and affirming. We also hope it empowers you to take action.
Understanding Borderline Personality Disorder
The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) describes BPD as a pervasive pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships, self-image, mood, and behavior. Often, it begins in early adulthood, but symptoms may be apparent earlier in life.
Those who suffer from BPD may exhibit these things:
- Intense fear of abandonment or rejection
- Unstable and highly conflicted relationships
- Rapid shifts between idealizing and devaluing others
- Persistent identity disturbance or unstable self-image
- Impulsive or self-destructive behavior
- Severe emotional volatility and mood swings
- Chronic feelings of emptiness
- Difficulty controlling anger
- Suicidal ideation, threats, or self-harming behaviors
- Stress-related paranoia or dissociation
Signs That BPD May Be Affecting Your Relationship
How do you know when a partner, parent, or another family member may have BPD? While every case is different, many patterns of behavior are frequently reported in relationships involving individuals with untreated or severe BPD.
These patterns include:
- Frequent emotional outbursts or severe reactions that seem out of nowhere
- Cycles of affection followed by hostility or withdrawal
- High-conflict communication and difficulty resolving disputes
- Manipulative or controlling behaviors, especially during conflict
- False accusations or distorted narratives
- Impulsive financial, relational, or parenting decisions
- Repeated crises that destabilize the household
- Difficulty maintaining healthy boundaries
- Efforts to alienate children from the other parent
All the above can leave you and your loved ones feeling emotionally exhausted, isolated, anxious, or constantly on edge. It’s no surprise that children may struggle greatly when under the care of a parent who’s chronically unstable, deceptive, and even aggressive.
For more useful information, visit our page devoted to outlining typical BPD behaviors and how to identify them.
How BPD Complicates Family Law Matters
In divorce, custody disputes, visitation issues, and other family law matters, BPD can present numerous legal, financial, and emotional challenges, particularly for spouses, children, and family members of someone who’s let their disorder go unchecked.
At Clarke Logan Young Law Office, we focus our practice on protecting people from harm and abuse stemming from BPD-related behaviors. We’ve handled hundreds of cases and have seen firsthand how this disorder can complicate even seemingly simple legal processes.
Here are common ways that BPD impacts family law:
- Constant litigation or repeated emergency filings
- Difficulty reaching or maintaining agreements
- Escalating co-parenting conflict
- Interference with custody or visitation arrangements
- Allegations of abuse or misconduct
- Manipulation of children during custody disputes
- Resistance to court orders or structured parenting plans
- Intense hostility during mediation or negotiations
Resources, Support, & Legal Guidance
If you believe BPD may be affecting your family situation, know that you’re not alone. Many people in situations like yours feel overwhelmed, emotionally drained, and uncertain about how to protect themselves or their children.
To explore whether you may be in a relationship with someone who has BPD, visit StopWalkingonEggShells.com for insights on the disorder and how you can determine if it’s to blame for the struggles you’ve experienced with a loved one.
We also urge you to empower yourself by reading books on the subject, including:
- Stop Walking on Eggshells by Paul T. Mason and Randi Kreiger
- Understanding the Borderline Mother: Helping Her Children Transcend the Tense, Unpredictable, and Volatile Relationship by Dr. Christine Ann Lawson
- The Borderline Personality: Vision and Healings by Dr. Nathan Schwartz-Salant
These resources could save your life, your children's lives, and maybe even your marriage. If you discover you are involved with someone who has BPD, these resources can validate your experience, inoculate you somewhat against a family member’s destructive behavior, and empower you to make whatever decisions are necessary for you to move on with your life and out of harm's way.
Set Up a Consultation at Clarke Logan Young Law Office
Want to tell your story to an attorney who can fight for you, safeguard your children and loved ones, and help you build a more stable future? Don’t hesitate to contact Clarke Logan Young Law Office. We focus our practice on handling high-conflict family law matters involving parents, spouses, and family members with BPD. With us, you can get the dedicated, experience-backed guidance and advocacy you deserve. Clarke L. Young also provides expert witness and consulting services for attorneys, legal professionals, medical providers, and others.
Call (424) 688-6006 or reach out online to request a free consultation at Clarke Logan Young Law Office. We proudly serve individuals and families throughout Los Angeles, the surrounding communities in Southern California, and across the United States and abroad.
Why Parents and Attorneys Choose Us
Extensive Experience in the Most Challenging Child Custody and Divorce Proceedings
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Litigating Borderline Personality Disorder Proceedings since 1993
Our practice is limited to the most psychologically intractable, legally complex, strategically sophisticated, hotly contested, expensive family law cases.
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Protecting Children from Pathogenic Parenting
We help heathy parents secure custody orders that shield their children from the emotional and psychological harms caused by the pathogenic Borderline parent.
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Personalized Representation for High-Stakes Cases
By limiting our caseload to only a few matters at a time, we are able to provide highly effective, strategically sophisticated, hands-one advocacy when your children’s lives and your life hang in the balance.
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Nationally and Internationally Recognized BPD Litigation Authority
Trusted by parents, attorneys, mental health professionals, and others worldwide for consulting, expert witness testimony, and strategic guidance.